Last updated on February 9th, 2023 at 07:48 pm

Do you ever feel like you don’t know how to talk to people? Or, do you say, “I don’t know how to talk to people”. If so, you’re not alone. Many of us struggle with communication, feeling like we don’t know how to connect with others.

In this blog post, we will explore why it can be difficult to talk to people and provide some tips to help improve your communication skills. We’ll start with a simple statement: “I don’t know how to talk to people.” This statement can be the first step to improving your communication and having more meaningful conversations with others.

1. You think you don’t know how to talk

It can be hard to engage in conversations, especially if you feel like you don’t know how to talk to people. A lot of us tend to feel awkward or uncomfortable when it comes to striking up a conversation, and this can lead to anxiety and low self-esteem.

Research has shown that the fear of social interaction is very common, with about 30% of adults experiencing social anxiety symptoms. It’s normal to struggle with communication and feel as if you don’t know how to talk to people; however, it doesn’t have to stay that way. With a few tips and some practice, you can learn how to become more confident in conversation.

2. This belief is impacting your life

If you are telling yourself “I don’t know how to talk to people” then chances are that this belief is having a profound effect on your life. People who believe this will often avoid social situations, leading to loneliness and missed opportunities. It can also lead to lowered self-confidence, which will in turn make conversations even more difficult.

When our own beliefs hold us back from engaging in conversations, we miss out on valuable opportunities to learn from others and experience new things. Furthermore, we may be unable to fully express ourselves or build meaningful relationships with other people. All of this can lead to feelings of worthlessness and unhappiness. It’s important to recognize that this belief does not need to define us and that it can be overcome with practice and dedication.

3. It’s important to improve social skills

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the idea of talking to people, the good news is that it’s something you can learn. You don’t have to be a natural talker in order to have meaningful conversations with others.
Start by having realistic expectations. Don’t expect to become an extrovert overnight, and don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Focus on improving little by little. Take a look at our free ebook for more tips!!

4. Another tip is to practice active listening

Rather than just waiting for your turn to speak, give your full attention to the other person. Listen to what they’re saying and ask questions about what they’re telling you. Show them you’re interested in them and what they say.

5. Be mindful of your body language when you talk 

Make sure you look relaxed and confident, with your posture open and welcoming. Maintaining good eye contact is also important in showing that you’re engaged in the conversation.

6. Start conversations with small talk

Most conversations start with topics like the weather or current events. Once you feel comfortable with this, you can start asking more meaningful questions like “How did you end up in this job?” or “What do you like most about your life right now?”

7. Finally, make sure to stay positive

Put aside any opposing thoughts or feelings you may have about not knowing how to talk to people, and focus on the present moment. Talk about things that make you happy and share stories that bring joy to the conversation.

how to small talk

8. With social interaction, practice is key

We all know that practice makes perfect, and the same is true for our interactions with others. Having the belief that “I don’t know how to talk to people” can be very limiting, so it’s important to start making changes. The research shows that those who have higher levels of preparedness when engaging in conversations have better outcomes than those who are unprepared.

9. Be prepared for the conversations you have

preparation means more than simply having the right words to say. Preparation also means thinking about body language, facial expressions, eye contact, and other nonverbal cues. All of these small details can make or break a conversation, so taking the time to plan ahead and practice can be hugely beneficial.

10. It can also be helpful to get feedback

from friends and family on your interactions with them. Ask them how they felt you could have done better during a conversation and try to implement their feedback next time you engage in conversation with someone. Additionally, it might help to use rehearsed conversations with yourself or friends as practice. This will help build confidence and give you a better idea of what to expect in real conversations.

11. Be open to learning from others

Learning about different types of communication styles, such as active listening and assertive communication, can help you become a better conversationalist. Seek out advice from those around you who seem to have good communication skills and ask them for tips and tricks. Or, take a look at our free ebook and get a discount on our course too.

Overall, if you are struggling with the thought, “I don’t know how to talk to people”, practice and preparation are key to improving your social skills. Taking the time to plan ahead, get feedback from those around you, rehearse conversations with friends, and learn from experienced communicators can all lead to improved results in conversations.

prepare and practice to talk to people

12. Anxiety can be impacting your social life

When it comes to socializing, we often find ourselves in situations where we don’t know how to talk to people. This feeling is common among many people, but for some, it is more than just a feeling of awkwardness. Anxiety can play a huge role in our ability to communicate with others, making it even harder to start a conversation or maintain one.

Fortunately, there are resources available to those who suffer from anxiety. Learning coping mechanisms and calming techniques can help manage anxious thoughts and emotions in social situations. Seeking professional help is also a good option for those who feel overwhelmed by their anxiety when trying to talk to people. Also, take a test to learn more about your anxiety here.

13. Having a plan of action and taking small steps

can be beneficial for managing anxiety in social situations. It’s important to understand that conversations don’t have to be perfect, and that most people would rather focus on the conversation than any perceived flaws. Taking the time to relax before talking to someone can also make it easier to ease into conversation. With practice, it is possible to learn how to talk to people and become more comfortable in social situations.

therapy for anxiety

14. The wrong social activities can do serious damage

Going to the right places and activities is essential for having positive social experiences, but if you feel like you don’t know how to talk to people, it can be hard to identify where you should go. Going to the wrong places can mean meeting people who are incompatible with your values and interests, resulting in awkward conversations or even worse – leaving without having spoken to anyone at all.

15. Consider the environment to socialize in

Going somewhere you feel comfortable, will give you the best chance at meeting new people. Think about what type of activities and conversations interest you, and then look for events or organizations related to those topics. You don’t need to attend huge gatherings or parties if that isn’t your thing – there are plenty of smaller meet-ups or other activities that might be more suitable. Additionally, consider joining a club or organization in your community that will allow you to interact with like-minded people.

Going to the right places doesn’t guarantee success, but it does provide a better platform for forming connections with other people. Once you start exploring, you’ll likely find plenty of opportunities for networking and making meaningful connections. And if you still don’t know how to talk to people, remember that practice makes perfect!

16. Sincere curiosity will improve your social life

When it comes to conversations, asking better questions is key to having a good time. Having curiosity and an eagerness to learn more about the people you are talking to can make the conversation more interesting and meaningful. Asking questions such as “What inspired you to get into this field?”, “What was your favorite thing about that experience?” or “What do you think of the latest news?” helps to keep the conversation going and gives you insight into the other person’s life.

17. You’re afraid of asking the wrong questions

Maybe you simply feel too awkward to have a deeper conversation. But if you are willing to step out of your comfort zone and ask thoughtful questions, your conversations will be more enjoyable and meaningful. Once you become a better questioner, you won’t be saying, “I don’t know how to talk to people”.

Questions not only provide you with information, but they also create the opportunity for meaningful conversations and lasting connections. Plus, asking questions shows that you are genuinely interested in getting to know the other person and can help break the ice when meeting someone new. So if you find yourself struggling with conversations, start being curious and ask thoughtful questions to spark a great conversation!

keys to a successful conversation

Where can you go from here …

Now that you’ve identified the reasons why you feel like you don’t know how to talk to people, it’s time to make some changes. First, challenge your negative thoughts about yourself. Remind yourself that everyone is capable of learning new social skills and that with practice, you can do this too. No more saying, “I don’t know how to talk to people”.

Then, start slowly by looking for social activities or events that interest you. If the thought of joining a conversation with a stranger feels too daunting, focus on creating meaningful connections with friends and new people.

What else can I do now? 

Try to remember that conversations are a two-way street. If you focus on asking questions and being curious about other people, it will make it easier to keep the conversation going. Make an effort to learn more about other people, their experiences, and their interests. This will not only help you become a better conversationalist, but it will also help you build relationships with others.

It’s important to recognize that learning how to talk to people takes time and practice. Don’t be too hard on yourself if conversations don’t always go as planned. Be patient with yourself and try to enjoy the process of making meaningful connections with others. After practice, believing in yourself, and learning, you won’t be saying, “I don’t know how to talk to people”.

Steve Anthony

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